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By Maria Scinto/Aug. 25, 2021 1:23 pm EDT
Cancers have kind of a bad rep when it comes to dating, at least in its early stages. This sign, above all others, is all about home, family, and security, which are all wonderful. None of these topics, however, is exactly prime first date conversational fodder, since we all know that showing interest in such things too soon is a recipe for disaster.
SwipeLife characterizes Cancers of both genders as something akin to the “Overly Attached Girlfriend” meme (via Business Insider). Most Cancers, no matter how emotional they are, are savvy enough to not start planning the wedding and naming the kids while their date is still studying the menu. After all, Cancers have been hearing for years just how “clingy” their sign is reputed to be. Still, they’re definitely not into playing the dating game for any longer than necessary. Cancers want to fall in love and have that love returned, so they need to know the right questions to ask in order to weed out players, users, and anyone else unworthy of their devotion.
Be ready with a few easy (yet informative) conversation starters
If you’re a Cancer on an awkward first date, you could always get the conversational ball rolling by asking about their favorite foods. While everyone has to eat — and most of us, whatever our signs may be, quite enjoy doing so — you can learn a lot about a person by what role food plays in their life. If they relay a touching anecdote about learning to bake cookies from their grandmother, that’s an excellent sign they may be a match for you. If they go on at great length about a gourmet meal they’ve just cooked, there’s a good chance you’re dating a Taurus, known to be one of Cancer’s most compatible signs. If your date starts name-dropping all the fanciest restaurants in Paris or the most obscure food stands in Jakarta, though, they might do better with a Leo or Sagittarius instead. In fact, they may well have been born under one of these two fire signs.
Another great first date topic is what the other person likes to do. Of course, you should never quiz a first date about where they see themselves in five years, but you can elicit important information simply by asking about all the activities they enjoy. Walks on the beach or family get-togethers get major Cancer brownie points, but if your date drops a hint that they’re waiting to catch the next cheap flight to Bali to bum around on the beach for an unspecified period of time, well, you may just want to bail.
How a date feels about family is crucial to Cancer
As a Cancer, you know full well there’s no real future for you and your date unless they see themselves settling down and starting a family of some sort (via Allure). No, you should absolutely not ask them how they feel about marriage or kids on a first date! Still, there’s nothing unusual about asking a new acquaintance about their mom and dad, brothers and sisters, et cetera. If they clam up and change the subject, or worse, say anything rude and dismissive, you should probably end your evening early. (Perhaps you’ve just remembered a 3 a.m. Zoom call with colleagues in Casablanca?) If, on the other hand, they go into great detail about a trip to the zoo with their 3-year-old nephew, then you might want to stick around and order dessert.
Any discussion of pets, we feel, should also fall under the family category. Anyone who says they’re just too busy for and/or don’t really care for animals may not be the best potential partner for the animal-loving Crab. If they pull out their phone to show you adorable pics of their elderly three-legged pooch, though, you’ve got a keeper right there.
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