Reproductive medicine explains: Social Freezing is an active life choice

More and more women are not fulfilled until late in their desire to have children. The own eggs to freeze can be for some a good way. The Munich-based specialist in Reproductive medicine, Jörg Puchta explains in this Interview, the most important questions about the treatment.

All the world is talking about currently, of Social Freezing. But since when is actually that women leave their eggs to freeze for later?

Since the end of the 90s, we have frozen eggs with the help of liquid nitrogen at minus 196° C, so far, however, with the method of Slow Freezings. The cells are cooled to 0.3 degrees per Minute down. Since 2007, we work with the so-called Flash Freezing, which means a cooling of 30 000 degrees per Minute.

A Problem of the high water content of the eggs. The process of cooling takes too long, ice Crystals form, the cell of which bears, under certain circumstances, damages. The shock frozen egg cells look under the microscope like pearls. Beautifully, perfectly.

So perfect that you advise women, already in young years of a certain stock?

I rate nothing. I’m just telling you what is possible. The Slow-Freezing was a stopgap. Above all women before chemotherapy came to us, in order to secure the possibility of a future pregnancy. However, the fact is: over 50 percent of the cells have not survived the process of preservation.

Today, the vitality rate is 95 percent – which means, of course, that 95 percent of the eggs can fertilize and use. The latter also depends on the age of the woman and the quality of the sperm cells. But I assume that on average half of the preserved oocytes, good quality embryos can be. This is a super value. With a view to artificial insemination, we can say, based on the current data situation: cells in the first place and then to return better results for mother and child provides freezing.

That sounds like frozen vegetables, the also a often higher, vitamin content is attributed as the supposed fresh vegetables from the Market.

That vitrivizierte eggs are so fit and it will stay that way – there is virtually no ageing processes, the egg is stored virtually in perpetual youth is, for me, in fact, the biggest Surprise of my career.

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How many women take advantage of that and create a stock to avoid, that the desire to have children fails one day, on the posthumous fertility?

To do this, I know of no survey. For our center, and we were the first in Germany to have offered Social Freezing, I can say that in our cooling tanks store more than ten thousand eggs. So far, we have 117 pregnancies from Social Freezing. 73 children are born, as of today,. For the next few years, I’m of a Boom. More and more colleagues are starting to put their skepticism.

Critics say the Social Freezing will put women under pressure in your work, it could subliminally be expected, the family planning to delay. Apple and Google to offer employees free of charge to freeze your eggs.

Clear horror scenarios one can draw. However, I see it more pragmatic and think of how it was, as in 1976, the artificial insemination was invented. Soon children are the glasses only in test tubes, feared a lot. Mankind was bred à la Aldous Huxley in the factory. And as it is today? The IVF is applied to five percent of all women. She is a super opportunity and may help in individual cases incredibly. But it remains the exception.

As I see it with the Social Freezing: It can be a possibility. Personally, I would advise women to live up to 30 in any case your life is relaxed. But the women who want to have early 30s, no children and no Partner, or professionally, just don’t go back, should be allowed to consider whether the method is not suitable for you.

Ultimately, Social Freezing is an active life choice that has little to do with material aspects, and a lot to do with the fact that we are today, just older. Phases of life are shifting. The proportion of over 40-year-old primipara has quadrupled since 1991. Should you find that frightening? I don’t think so. I say: The 40-Year-olds of today are different than 20, 30 years ago. You seem young, and are in fact often also physically fitter. For me, this shows how adaptable the person is.

There are borders? When would you want a woman with no ova more?

If I have the feeling that pregnancy would strain the body too much. But something is not a number. I can’t deny a lump sum of all 45-Year-old the return of their ova, when thousands of women in this age are still in a natural way pregnant! The majority of pregnancies of women in this age, we have had so far, have worked well.

What is the Social Freezing?

I always say: Expect you for collection and Freezing with 2000 euros, so with the cost of a holiday. And for storage with 25 Euro per month, the four boxes of cigarettes. Cigarettes: I say this quite deliberately. Because the greatest risk for an early menopause so that women can prematurely’t have any more children Smoking.

This 1 Hack Completely Saves My Sanity While Traveling With My Kids During the Holidays

Holiday travel is always crazy, but it’s especially chaotic and stressful when you have kids. The traffic, the crowded airports, the rest-stops, the long lines, and did I mention the traffic? No matter how you get around during the holiday season, it’s usually never entirely pleasant. When I was a kid, it was all about long road trips to visit family. And since I never enjoyed being in the car for long stretches of time, my mom came up with a genius idea to keep me entertained; every hour — if my brothers and I behaved — we would each get one mystery bag with some little activity inside that would hopefully keep us occupied until the next bag, and the next, until finally, we’d arrive at our destination. While I give my mom full credit on this one, I’m far too lazy to make individual bags for each of my kids for every hour we’re in the car, so I came up with my own hack to keep them happy: road trip baskets.

My family and I mostly travel up and down the East Coast by car, but this one big travel hack could work for planes and trains as well. It keeps my kids occupied, keeps me from hearing the dreaded “Are we there yet?” question a thousand times, and ultimately keeps me sane on the usually dangerous roads full of other holiday travelers. Each child gets one basket, and inside are crafts, books, activities, and snacks to keep them busy for hours. I put them in an easy-to-reach spot and my kids can take out whatever they want whenever they want without having to ask me. The first time I used these baskets on a six-hour road trip with two kids, it was the easiest trip we’d ever taken. Since that trip, I’ve made countless baskets and am currently working on a few for the upcoming holidays.

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The most original baby names of 2018

When it comes to baby names, some parents go the traditional route and give their precious bundles of joy tried and true names that have been beloved for generations. Other parents, however, take a more creative route and give their babies names that are a bit further off the beaten path. In some cases, the names are even made up altogether! Parents in 2018 have given their babies some pretty unique names, to say the least. 

Parenting website BabyCenter keeps an up-to-date list of popular baby names of the year based on user data collected from parents who report what they named their babies. While these rankings are subject to change, and we can’t know for sure how popular a name is until the Social Security Administration releases the official rankings of 2018 U.S. baby names in 2019, the list does give us some insight into some of the uncommon names that parents are choosing for their little ones. Here are some of the most original names of 2018.

Niamey

Geography whizzes and globetrotters might recognize Niamey as the capital of the African country of Niger, but they have probably never thought of it as a potential baby name. In addition to being the capital, Niamey is also Niger’s largest city and sits along the Niger River. This unique name follows in the footsteps of other beloved baby names inspired by international locations such as Paris, London, and Cairo.

Niamey’s history as a baby name is fairly recent, but the name is proving to be quite the contender. In 2017, users ranked the name at an abysmally low 19,630 on the BabyCenter charts, but by 2018 it had catapulted into the top 50 names for girls — talk about a big leap! Perfect for world travelers, or for people who want to pay homage to the city, Niamey is a unique baby name that we will be seeing more of in the future. 

Reign

It was just a few years ago that Lorde was telling us that we’ll never be royals, but parents of 2018 are ignoring her lyrics. They’re determined to raise their kids as princes and princesses and are picking regal names to prove it. Reign has been seeing an upward trend for girls over the last few years and hit an all-time high in 2018. In fact, it has been on the rise since Lorde debuted “Royals” in 2013, so maybe we have her to thank for the growing popularity of the name. 

It’s only in the top 500 BabyCenter names so far, but at this rate the original name will likely catch on with more parents in the near future. This isn’t the only royal baby name on the rise, either. Parents of little girls are going with Reign, but parents of boys are loving the royal moniker King, which made BabyCenter’s top 100 list in 2018.

Kayson

Kayson is a modern-sounding name that is anchored in a traditional one. A more up-to-date take on the popular name Jason, a classic name that can trace its roots back to Greek mythology, Kayson has been sneakily on the rise with parents over the last few years. The spelling of this name is pretty flexible. If you aren’t a fan of the “y” in the middle of Kayson, don’t worry because you still have options if you like the sound of the name. Spelling variations of Kayson include Kason and Kasen. 

While Kayson has a distinctive ring to it, the moniker is part of an ongoing name trend of popular baby names (especially for boys) ending in the letter “n.” Other increasingly popular names that are also part of this trend include Grayson, Mason, Carson, Hudson, and Kayden, all of which consistently rank in the top 100 baby names for boys.  

Brinley

This English name has been in the top 500 names for a few years now, and is slowly but steadily making its way to the top of the charts. BabyCenter users put Brinley in the top 350 names for girls in 2018. The name means “tawny,” and can be spelled in a variety of ways including Brynlee and Brynleigh. It lends itself easily to nicknames and can be broken down to Brin and Lee, giving parents two built-in options for shortening the name for their baby girls.

Brinley’s “ley” ending will appeal to the wave of parents who are choosing names ending in the syllable for their little ones. Other unique “ley” names that are catching on with parents include Kinley, Kinsley, Paisley, Finley, and Hadley. Brinley manages to sound fresh while also incorporating the trendy “ley” ending, making this name both an original and stylish pick for fashion forward parents. 

Everleigh

Names ending in “ley” and “ly” are quite popular right now, which has some parents turning to different spellings in order to put a new spin on beloved names. One such name is Everleigh, a spelling variation of the far more popular Everly. This new version preserves the sound of the more traditional spelling, while making it different enough to not be too common. Everly is an upwardly mobile name that hit the top hundred in the U.S. in 2017, while Everleigh lagged far behind, only coming in at 387.

This distinctive spelling of the name is climbing up the ranks too, though, and made it into the top 200 on BabyCenter’s list in 2018. It might take a couple of years for this take on the name to close the gap, so for now, Everleigh remains one of the most original names of 2018.

Avianna

Avianna is a name that is both striking and elegant, so it’s pretty clear why parents are loving it for their baby girls. It broke into the top 400 on BabyCenter’s baby name charts for girls in 2018. Similar in sound to the more popular Arianna, the one letter between the two names makes a world of difference — Avianna is a great alternative if you’re looking for something a bit more original.

If you’re worried that the name is a bit too long-winded for a baby girl, you can easily shorten Avianna to Avi, Ava, Anna, or even Vianna. If you prefer a sleeker look, you could also opt to spell the name as Aviana, a variation which is catching up in popularity to Avianna. This name has a lot of potential, and it’s easy to envision the unique moniker overtaking the more traditional Arianna within the next few years.  

Little

In a field of unique names, Little still stands out since it’s not something that most people would typically think of as name. While it’s recognizable as a last name, such as with the Little family of the book and film Stuart Little, seeing it used as a first name is quite uncommon. Little made BabyCenter’s top 200 names for boys in 2018, and is also on the rise for girls where it is in the top 300 names.

This name might be a bit too unique for some parents, though, and it’s hard to say whether a baby will appreciate being named Little once they are all grown up. The name’s ascent up the charts, however, means that a few years from now the name might not be considered that unusual, so parents who like the sound of Little could be getting in early on a trendy name by giving it to their babies in 2018

Alivia

One time-tested way of creating a new and original baby name is to take an existing name and put a bit of a spin on it. That’s what’s happening with the name Alivia, a name that is in BabyCenter’s top 250 names for baby girls. Say it out loud, and it sounds nearly identical to the name Olivia, which is just one letter different. Olivia is one of the most popular names in the United States. It has been ranked in the top 10 baby names for girls since 2001, making it well overdue for an update.

Olivia itself was made up by William Shakespeare for his play Twelfth Night. Considering the fact that the playwright is famously remembered for making up many words that are still used in the English language today, we think that he would appreciate the twist parents are putting on the name he coined.

Atlas

While this name isn’t exactly a new one and can trace its roots back to Greek mythology, its use as a baby name in America is far from common. Atlas was on the Social Security Administration’s baby name charts in 1883 and 1890, but then disappeared from the ranks for more than a century. It popped back up in 2013, and has seen a slow and steady rise since then. BabyCenter users ranked it in the top 300 names for boys in 2018.

The story of Atlas in Greek mythology varies depending on the source, but a couple of the more well-known legends portray him as being responsible for holding up the heavens. This version of Atlas is the one we commonly remember today, and inspired the title of author and philosopher Ayn Rand’s magnum opus, Atlas Shrugged. If you want a unique name with a long legacy for your baby, Atlas is a solid choice.

Jhazelle

Jhazelle is a name that you’ve likely never heard of, but you will in the near future. This original name calls to mind a couple of other more widely used names. It is quite similar in sound to the German name Giselle, which means “a pledge.” It is also close to the names Janelle and Jasmine. In Jhazelle, these beloved names have been rolled together in a new and unique package. Its popularity has been rather sudden, seemingly springing up overnight. In 2017, Jhazelle was barely noticeable with a ranking in the 12,000s on the charts, but by 2018 had jumped into the top 150 names for girls. 

The name’s newness on the charts makes it a prime pick for trendsetting parents. Its distinctive spelling, combined with its commonalities with classic names, make Jhazelle unique without being too unusual. This makes it ideal for parents who are looking for a name that makes a statement, but who still appreciate the sound of more traditional monikers. 

Wynter

When it comes to the four seasons, Summer and Autumn are the only ones that really get much love as baby names, with Spring and Winter traditionally being rarely used. Winter has begun to break that trend, however, and has started to see use as a given name in the last few years. Winter would be distinctive enough, but some parents are taking things one step further and changing up the season’s spelling by naming their babies Wynter.

Wynter entered the top 600 BabyCenter names in 2018. Winter might be the chilliest of seasons, but it still has a lot to offer. While it doesn’t have the warmth of Summer or the rich colors of Autumn, the name Wynter calls to mind the holiday season, snowflakes, cozy nights by the fire, and cups of hot cocoa. What’s not to love, especially when the name comes with such a striking spelling?

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How to Teach Your Kids That Voting Matters — but So Does Compassion

Look, we know. We really know. It’s 2018, and you don’t know what to tell your kids about the actual state of the union anymore. Your Facebook feed is clogged with politics and nasty word wars about immigration and border control. You’re dreading Thanksgiving dinner because it’s pretty much a given Uncle Frank will get drunk and talk about arming preschool teachers and rabbis while your sister and her wife rage-cry into the mashed potatoes. Some mornings, you can’t remember why you thought it was a good idea to bring kids into this world. 

And that’s exactly why your vote matters today more than ever. Take your kids. Slap on an "I Voted" sticker. Just keep caring, OK? Caring is a revolutionary act when you’re slipping into a CNN or Fox News coma and all seems hopeless.

And no matter what your politics are, no matter what your religion is, you can choose to care — actively. Even if you’re feeling like your vote doesn’t count for much, your compassion still does. And there are many ways to help create a world for our children that is kinder and far better than this one. But it takes action — and one simple rule most of us were taught as children: Treat others as you would want to be treated. 

So on this voting day, put yourselves in the shoes of parents who are fleeing appalling, dangerous conditions in Central America. Whatever you feel about immigration, remember the caravan you’ve heard about is made up of families just like you and yours. Like you, these are parents who love their children more than anything. They are trekking hundreds and thousands of miles to try to keep their children safe and out of harm’s way. They are trying to escape poverty, violence, hunger and homelessness and find a better life for their families. 

Will the U.S. grant them asylum? It seems doubtful. But you can help these families. You can choose nonpartisan kindness today. Because kindness isn’t red or blue. 

Make compassion your platform. 

Here’s how:

Educate yourself & your kids 

Read about the caravan and reject xenophobia and fearmongering. Our country is better than that. Our kids deserve better than that.

Donate together 

Here are just a few nonprofit humanitarian organizations offering assistance and care on the frontlines. 

  • Save the Children’s Border Crisis Children’s Relief Fund: This fund provides emergency services and legal aid and works to reunite families.
  • UNICEFThis organization is working with the government of our neighbor Mexico to provide safe drinking and bathing water, hygiene essentials, sunscreen, access to support and much-needed training to authorities on child welfare, protection and nutrition.
  • Amnesty International Americas: Amnesty International is working overtime to document and monitor the situations and devastating conditions the families in the caravan are fighting against.
  • Pueblo Sin Fronteras: This immigrant rights group organized the caravan.

Help your kids call or email your congressperson or senator

If you’re not sure where to start, go to the U.S. House of Representatives website and enter your zip code. Looking for a senator? Just choose your state here. These sites will provide your elected officials’ names and contact information. 

Another route: Identify your reps at Democracy.io, and email with ease.

Voting matters. But compassion might matter even more these days. Make kindness your platform, and you’ll raise kids who care too. 

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4 easy Diwali sweets that kids can help you prepare at home

Team up with your kids to make healthy delicious Diwali sweets at home.

By Payal Kothari

It can be quite challenging to ensure one is having only sweets that are healthy. For someone who has a sweet tooth, be it a teen or tween, the addictive and harmful effects of white refined sugar are always a concern. With that in mind, we have created a few fun healthy options for Diwali sweets which your child can make on their own under an adult’s supervision.

The preparation process will engage your kids’ other senses besides taste, thus bridging the gap between look, smell and feel. So, make it a family culture / tradition to cook during festivals. Asking your kids for inputs while cooking makes them feel they are included in decision-making and the recipes. Encourage them to make a shopping list, take them shopping for it, and tweak recipes to make them create new recipes. Make sure the cooking environment is safe for them, and always ensure that there is an adult around for assistance.

Here are four healthy yet yummy recipes for your child-

Granola crumble


Ingredients:

2 cups rolled oats, 1 teaspoon vanilla, 1/4 cup honey, ¼ cup jaggery or brown sugar, 1 cup unsweetened shredded coconut, 1/4 cup seeds, 1/2 cup almonds, ½ cup dark chocolate, salt as per your taste

Method:

Preheat the oven to 107 degrees Celsius.

Add all ingredients in a medium sized bowl and mix well.

Spread onto a rimmed baking sheet and bake for 8-10 minutes, stirring every 3 minutes and removing the pan as soon as the granola starts to brown lightly.

Cool and store in an airtight glass jar.

Moong dal ladoo in coconut sugar


Ingredients:

1 cup moong dal, ¼ cup ghee, ½ cup coconut sugar, 2 powdered cardamom

Also Read| Diwali 2018: 4 must-try treats to enjoy with your family

Method:

In a pan add moong dal and roast over medium heat until the color changes to golden brown. Spread the roasted moong dal on a wide plate and allow to cool. Powder the roasted moong dal to a smooth texture using a blender.

In a bowl, add powdered moong dal, coconut sugar, crushed cardamom powder and mix well.

Heat the ghee slightly in a microwave oven or in a small pan, but do make sure it’s not hot.

Now add to the powdered moong dal mixture and mix well. Shape them into small balls and serve. It can be stored for 2 weeks in an airtight container.

Ironman dessert aka beetroot halwa


Ingredients:

2 cups grated beetroot, ¼ cup brown sugar, 1 tbsp ghee, 2 cups regular/almond milk, 3 gms raw cashew nuts, 1 powdered cardamom

Method:

Rinse, peel and grate the beetroot using a vegetable grater.

In a saucepan, heat ghee, add cashew nuts and roast until the color changes to golden brown and remove. We shall use this as garnish.

Now add the grated beetroot and cook until the beetroot becomes soft. Add milk and cook until all the milk evaporates and the mixture now has a thick halwa like consistency.

Add brown sugar, crushed cardamom and mix well. Cook again until the beetroot mixture becomes thick. Garnish with roasted cashew nuts and serve.

(The author is an integrative & Functional Nutritionist)

 

 

 

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Pediatric anesthesia does not affect development outcomes

(HealthDay)—Young children who have surgical procedures that require general anesthesia do not have an increased risk for adverse child development outcomes, according to a study published online Nov. 5 in JAMA Pediatrics.

James D. O’Leary, M.D., from The Hospital for Sick Children in Toronto, and colleagues examined the correlation between surgical procedures that require general anesthesia before primary school entry and child development in a retrospective sibling-matched cohort study, including sibling pairs aged 5 to 6 years with the same birth mother. Participants completed the Early Development Instrument (EDI) population-based measure of child development that assessed readiness to learn in five major domains. Data were included for 2,346 sibling pairs with only one sibling exposed to surgery.

The researchers found that after adjustment for confounding factors, exposed and unexposed children had no significant differences in early developmental vulnerability (22.6 versus 20.0 percent; adjusted odds ratio, 1.03; 95 percent confidence interval, 0.98 to 1.14; P = 0.58). There were also no significant differences for each of the five major EDI domains (language and cognitive development; physical health and well-being; social knowledge and competence; emotional health and maturity; and communication skills and general knowledge).

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Diwali 2018: 9 ways your kids can enjoy the festival without bursting crackers

Here’s how you can celebrate a green Diwali with your kids and other family members.

By Mansi Jain

You all must be gearing up to celebrate Diwali. The festival is a harbinger of fun, harmony, enthusiasm and prosperity, but in recent years, it’s also been cause of worry, because of the negative impact on air pollution. As a responsible parent, you can encourage your kids to celebrate Green Diwali. Here’s how you can do it!

1. DIY decorations

Unleash your latent creativity and make crafts at home. You can make beautiful Bandhanwar or torans to hang on your door, bells, etc, using some waste products. This will save a lot of money and usage of plastic.

2. Light a diya instead of fairy lights

Isn’t it high time that we become environmentally conscious and save our resources? Well, yes! It’s a wise decision to light earthen pots and diyas instead of decorating the house with fairy lights.


3. Restrict the use of incense sticks

People want their home to have an auspicious air during Diwali. Hence, they burn a lot of incense sticks ignoring the fact that the smoke emitting from them can lead to a lot of respiratory issues. So, use it wisely and when necessary.

Also Read| Diwali 2018: Escape Delhi pollution with these quick family getaways

4. Use flowers and herbal colours

Flowers add beauty to a home. One can use flowers to decorate the house and make a welcome Rangoli. You can also use herbal or organic colours which do not contain detergents and plastic. The adulterated colours can be harmful when they dissolve in water.

5. Arrange a get-together at home

We all want to meet our friends and relatives on Diwali. So, arrange a suitable get-together at home and play games. Plan some fun activity for kids and elders of the family. Sit and eat together to resolve differences and reunite on Diwali.

6. Stop burning crackers

Make your children aware that burning crackers is not a positive act. Besides it being a waste of money, the pollution from crackers reduces many years from our lifespan. It makes us prone to breathing problems, skin diseases, etc. We have all been live witness to the blanket of pollution in the atmosphere after Diwali.

7. Do some charity

It’s a festival for all! Instead of wasting your money on unfair means, spread joy to others. Do some charity. Visit an old age home or an orphanage to spend with those who live there. You can also distribute sweets among them.

8. Stop immersing idols in holy water

Most of us immerse the idols of gods and goddesses in holy water. This doesn’t just pollute the water, but harms marine life as well. It even leads to water pollution, which ultimately impacts our overall health.

9. Plant a tree

While many are contributing towards polluting the environment, you can become a responsible citizen. So, plant a tree! Ask others to do so as well. Make your child aware of the need to plant more trees. Nothing is better than a Green Diwali.

One must not wait for others to begin this green step. Make a start yourself and pave the path for others. Each one of us must take this green step to save our very own first home-the environment.

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The Pros & Cons of Co-sleeping With Older Kids

It makes sense to sleep with your child within their first few years of life. Your kids might be scared of the dark — which is a pretty common fear — and they could also be looking for attachment and safety. Yet at a certain point, your kids need to grow up and learn to sleep on their own.

“Children typically are taught to sleep in their own beds between ages 5 and 8 years old. Some parents need education on how to successfully do that, which is why they never teach their children or teach them too late,” licensed marriage and family therapist Katie Ziskind tells SheKnows. “I recommend parents start their child around age 5 in the child’s bed to teach their child that their bed is safe,” she says.

Not only will this improve your own quality of sleep (and probably your sex life!), but also, it’ll create a sense of independence for your child and help them learn to feel comfortable on their own.

If you’re struggling to say no — which can be hard when your kids are so darn cute — consider these pros and cons of letting older kids share your bed.

Pro: It fosters closeness

Co-sleeping does provide that bonding experience between parent and child — on both ends. Kids feel safe throughout the night. If a kid starts in the parents’ bed, the child will consider that bed to be theirs all the time. So, if a nightmare happens, the child can spend the whole night in the parent’s bed and feel protected, Ziskind explains.

If the kids start in their own beds but have a nightmare in the middle of the night, letting them join you could be the only way to mitigate their anxiety. “Kids need comfort. If your child wakes up crying, absolutely offer comfort, soothing and support by bringing them from their own room into your bedroom and into your bed for some cuddles,” she says.

Likewise, sometimes parents need some extra comfort. “For instance, if a parent has recently lost their spouse, they may want their child or teen to sleep with them for their own comfort, but this may not be in the best interest of the child,” says Ziskind.

Con: It also fosters dependence

It’s OK for your kids to feel dependent on you when they’re young; however, once they reach a certain age, it’s time to learn to take care of themselves. This isn’t to say they should be thrown on a subway or start walking home alone — they’re still young! — but learning how to clean up after themselves and withstand a night of darkness and potential terrors would be beneficial for both parents and child.

“Children need to learn independence and that they can be OK on their own and in the dark,” Ziskind says.

Con: It wreaks havoc on your sex life

Womp-womp. If you’re wondering why sexy-time has diminished, you can look to your co-sleeping habits with your children. “When kids sleep with parents, the parents lose out on intimate time. Children can weave their way into a marriage and cause parents to miss out on important alone time as adults,” she says.

Parents need to have firm boundaries about their bed being theirs and theirs alone. “If parents are struggling and are in conflict in their marriage, I often see one parent be passive-aggressive by bringing a child into the parent’s bed to block intimacy,” Ziskind adds. This will only exacerbate the sexual drought and cause tension in the relationship.

Con: It causes you to skimp on sleep

Co-sleeping can also mess with your shut-eye and prevent you from getting those 7 to 8 hours of sleep you need each night to wake up feeling restored. (And as busy parents, you really need those!)

Kids can be noisy, take up room on the bed to limit space for parents and be needy when scared. These distractions can make bedtime hard for parents, explains Ziskind. What’s more, since you’re missing out on regular sex, you’re not able to active feel-good hormones, such as oxytocin, the love hormone, to help you snooze faster and soundly throughout the night.

The takeaway? If your kid is really struggling at a young age, it’s OK to bend the rules. However, once kids turn 5, it’s smart to create some rules, educating kids on sleeping alone and prioritizing alone time for your and your S.O.

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